Wienerless in Lubbock: A Fat Guy’s Nightmare

So last night I stopped by a fast food restaurant. I ordered my two chili dogs and a lemonade, got my order and came home. I had not eaten all day so my belly was screaming at me for something other than coffee.

I open my sack of shame (yeah, like my chunkiness needs to be within 10 feet of a chili dog), I unwrap my dog, and yep, you guessed it, no effin' dog! They totally screwed me on the wiener! Just chili and bread!

If I pay for wiener, I better get wiener! LOL. It was dead at the restaurant, no line at all... just me. I was obviously dealing with a genius behind the grill.

Maybe it was a training issue, so here's a helpful cheat sheet for you guys:

• Step 1: Put hot wiener inside of bun.
• Step 2: Dump that hot, salty, chili-like substance on top of bun and wiener.
• Step 3: Wrap with paper and put in bag.

So there you go. Just a little more proof that Jesus is still mad at me. Always count your blessings, folks.

Love, Big - Wienerless in Lubbock...