A Beginner’s Guide To Surviving Lubbock

Let this serve as a little bit of a Lubbock primer for some of you.

Whether you care to fit in or just want to know what to expect, I have a Beginners Guide To Lubbock for you.

#1. You Support Texas Tech In Lubbock

You don't get a choice in the matter. You are automatically a follower of the Red & Black.

There is some wiggle room when it comes to the Dallas Cowboys because Texas Tech grad Patrick Mahomes plays for the Chiefs. Any other choices will make you stick out like an alien with its pants down.

#2. Life Revolves Around Tortillas In Lubbock

We make 'em, we eat 'em, and we throw them at Texas Tech games. From breakfast burritos to ball games, tortillas are life here.

#3. The Towns And People Surrounding Lubbock Are Afraid Of Us

Just talk to someone who lives in a surrounding town and ask why they don't live in Lubbock proper. They'll then say, "Y'all have too much crime there."

They will then go back to a meth-infested hellhole where people sell dirt for a living.

#4. Lubbock Is Cotton Country

Sure, cotton doesn't dominate the town the way it used to, but don't tell anyone that. It's heresy to think anything other than "cotton is king," even though medical has probably surpassed it.

#5. The Lubbock Streets Are Worse Than A Game Of Super Mario Kart

I know everyone complains about other drivers, but it's crazy out there. We just had a guy ram two vehicles because another vehicle made him mad. That's about par for Lubbock.

#6. Strangers In Lubbock Will Talk To You, And It's Always About The Weather

For a town where the weather doesn't really change much, we sure as heck talk about it a lot. Then again, every actual dust storm or haboob does feel a bit apocalyptic, and "the farmers do need the rain."

#7. Lubbock Weather Is Extreme

So there you go, a stranger already talking about the weather. Here we have intense heat, choking dust, and when it rains we don't know how to deal with it. Recent rains took us from that fresh clean smell to moldy-rot in three days.

Read More: Lubbock's Heavy Rainfall: Are We Prepared For More Flooding?

#8. Women, Especially Young Ones, Like To Wear Boots With Skirts In Lubbock

Now the locals who are reading this are scratching their heads, but it's weird as hell out in the real world. Imagine a college girl wearing a pair of shorts with fishing waders, and that's kind of what it looks like. It's a weird fashion choice for sure.

#9. In Lubbock, There Is Both Nothing, And Everything To Do Here

We do get our fair share of touring concerts, plays, and even an exhibit every now and then, but if you just feel like getting out on a random day or night, chances are nothing is happening.

And by nothing, I mean no zoo, no pool, no aquarium, and nothing outside of the norm.

So that's your beginner's guide to surviving Lubbock.

Welcome to town. It's a good kind of boring and weird.